it’s always a journey

Image: mineIt’s always a journey.

Life, that is.  And not just life in the whole-kit-and-caboodle existence thing, but different parts of life.

Take writing, for example. A few years ago signing a publishing contract seemed the end of an impossible journey.  Now that I’ve done it, I’ve discovered that it isn’t. In fact, now I’ve signed a contract I’m suddenly worrying about the book – something I thought wouldn’t be an issue. The journey goes on. I find myself in a crisis of confidence. Is this really good enough? Or will people look at it, shrug their shoulders and think ‘whatever’? I always wanted to do the best I could with it. Now I’m even more anxious that I do.

I need to give myself a talking to, no doubt.

It’s not about other people’s approval. 

But I want to make a difference! I want it to mean something – all this work, all this hoping, all this trying to follow God’s calling.

Not the same thing. Plus, the last bit – the God-calling bit – that’s the thing to cling to. Why should that change now, now that it’s official? Didn’t you let go of all that ‘seeking others’ approval’ thing a few years back/last September/a week ago (delete as appropriate)?

Shuffle, shuffle (that’s my feet). Well, ye-esss.

Then what’s the problem?

Just a little scared.

Fair enough. But the journey goes on, right? You’ve just turned a corner and it’s all new and different.

Very different. We’re moving house/area/church too, you know.

Yes, I do know. I’m you, remember?

Oh. Right. Of course.

So it’s scary and you’re more tired than you’d like to be, and you feel guilty about feeling like that, because so many people want to get to the place you just reached. But…

But?

But it’s a journey. You can’t analyse every footstep. You’ve just got to put one foot forward…yes, just like that. 

One foot forward. Right. Okay. My next task in life is actually…cleaning the bathroom.

Go clean the bathroom.

Um. All right. Come on, feet.

PS You know you’ve got company, right? There’s someone who sticks with you with every step – big or small. In every place you’ve been and ever will be… 

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4 thoughts on “it’s always a journey

  1. Giving yourself a good talking to here, Lucy? Hope it helped. The most significant part of this post for me was this,”But it’s a journey. You can’t analyse every footstep”. So true and so wise. Each new territory we venture into has the potential to scare as well as excite us. Over-thinking is our downfall in many areas and certainly in this. It’s good to:Stop. Pause. Breathe. Pray. Walk. Repeat. Thinking of you as you take on much to tax you in the months ahead. Birthing a new book and moving house, hmm…no wonder you need to take one tiny step at a time. And you’ll do it. God brought you to these things and He will sustain you as you lean on Him, relying on His strength not your own. Blessings and prayers. 🙂 xx

  2. Growing up in a household where, ‘best foot forward’, was a common expression, the implication always seemed to be that it meant stepping out with the right foot but recently I read somewhere that in the sort of situation you describe the thing to do is put the left foot forward a little then place the right foot in front of it. Maybe a real step means moving both feet?

    I can certainly empathise with the talking to oneself but, as I think Joy is hinting at by repeating your comment, we can over-analyse and, in my case at least, that often leads to wallowing in the mire. Difficult to take any sort of positive step from that position. In theory, turning the thoughts into prayers ands addressing them to God instead of oneself should help but in practice it seems that something ‘incarnationally’ physical – like cleaning the bathroom – is what really does the trick.

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